Love is ... pain (Week 43)

Love is....pain.

Love is so many things. They are the things we love Love to be. It is fun, sappy, romantic, giving, innocent, etc. But let's all face it, no matter who you are or where you go Love is sometimes about pain.

I have seen a parent sobbing in prayer over her wayward adult child, his life riddled with drink, drugs, bad women, and worse environments. I have seen a young girl in her most formative years strive to forgive her mom, a mom she still loves deeply, for neglecting her, permitting drugs and evil men near her, and worse things that I don't even want to remember. I have seen spouses and significant others mentally, physically, and emotionally abused and yet they still love the abuser. I have seen friends hurt themselves with feelings of inadequacy, drugs, etc. I have been hurt by others I loved and called friend. And I have seen siblings fight viciously in the way that only one who knows you well can.

To love is to risk, and to risk inevitably involves pain. We risk so much when we love. We make ourselves vulnerable in all ways to the ones we love. We invest time, money, and effort in them. And we desperately want the loved to be happy and to love us in return. So when those things don't happen, it hurts. And it hurts severely.

I can easily provide a list of a million ways that Love can cause us pain. But I also know something that makes that list seem slight. There is no good without bad, no right without wrong, no Love without Pain. It is the dichotomy of life that even makes us aware that Love exists. We would not be able to recognize just how wonderful Love is if we did not know the pain that is its opposite. And I suspect that if you love already, then you too know this.

I said at the beginning that it mattered not Who you were, Love would cause you pain. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." (James 3:16 KJV) Jesus came to this earth with one purpose and to achieve that purpose He went through Gethsemane, scourging, being nailed to a cross, being denied, and watching those He loved watch Him die. Is there any greater pain that can be endured in this life than to watch and feel the physical, emotional, and spiritual absence of Love and Hope around you?

"Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows." (Matthew 10:29-31 KJV) I read this and I remember just how much my Father loves me and that He knows all that happens in my life. And I know that every time I choose other than what He would for me, He watches in pain. Am I, therefore, so special that I can love without it? No. I must simply endure the pain that comes with the blessing of Love. I must accept it and hold on to both in order to feel the one. I must welcome each into my life and know that they are equally important. And I must recognize that Love is sometimes pain.
- Therasa

Project 52 Date #43

Carving Pumpkins,
So we were a little late in the picking of the pumpkins but we both found some "Sleepy Hollow" worthy ones that we liked. JT's was huge and un-centered and mine was smaller and warty :)
I printed out some pattern during the week so that we would have plenty of options to choose from. Got out the carving utensils from the craft drawer and picked up a few new ones to add to our collection so we were all set to go.
I set up the room with two old towels for the actual disemboweling of the pumpkins because we all know how messy that can get. Next we picked our pattern and went to work! JT made some awesome chili to keep us well fed and I recorded a scary movie to be playing in the background. I was done pretty quick but if you know my husband, he is very detail oriented (home school) but I have to admit his pumpkin blew mine out of the water. This date was great fun and something we haven't really taken the time to do in a few years! Yahhh -Mia





Tonight we took Jocelyn to the pumpkin patch down the street for some photos and to pick out a couple to take home. Picking the right pumkin takes years to master so we're starting Jocelyn out early. You have to thump em in similar fashion to a watermelon but with a few differences. No I'm not telling you the difference, family secrets can't be shared. So once Jocelyn was in bed we got down to business. We picked designs and then diembowled our pumkins. Gutting a pumpkin takes awhile. Tracing out a design takes forever!!!!! Well really the more elaborate the design the longer it takes. Anyways, after some intense moments on my part making sure everything turned out right we were finally done. They both turned out awesome. We haven't carved pumpkins together since moving from the old house so thats like almost 4 years. It was a blast! I thoroughly enjoyed this one! -J.T.

Love is…REFILLS! (Week 42)

We often hear the analogy of “pouring into” something. “What you put in, you’ll get out of the class,” a professor might say. Galatians 6:7 says, “Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap”I believe that one of the most important things to pour yourself into is your marriage. I know that love is all kinds of things to all kinds of people, but after being given this assignment by Mia, I feel lead to speak…er…write, on the subject of holy macaroni. Er, matrimony. All kidding aside, MARRIAGE IS SERIOUS BUSINESS! This past weekend my husband and I were blessed to spend two nights alone in a hotel in the magnificent hill country. The day before we left, I got the stomach bug that had been going around Corpus, and the first night we were there my sweet hubby got it. But we didn’t let that stop us! We laid in bed and watched football, talked for hours, and remembered our dreams together. We so often get caught up in the day-to-day humdrum of life that we forget to enjoy one another. When we were dating, we would talk about all of the things we might do once we were “one.” We’d try to imagine the opportunities we thought we might have on this lifelong journey together. It was so much fun! It’s nice to be reminded that the person you’re sleeping in bed with every night is your best friend – the only person you would want to spend a weekend away with, and also the person you love being sick with. Spend this week pouring, ladies and gentlemen, into your marriages. Invest time in those relationships which form who you are. May the Lord bless your efforts

Project 52 Date #42

Up With The Sun!

This date night was actually a date morning to watch the sun come up together. So that night we just relaxed and caught up on our shows. We woke up before the sun so we could get some things done for when Jocelyn wakes up. I made us some fantastic hot cocoa that went perfect with the chilly morning. We sat upstairs in a big ole chair and watched the sun come up over our neighbors roof line through our big guestroom window. It was a great sunset too, all purple-red-orangish colored. It was something very simple but something we take for granted and was really nice to stop and be still and enjoy the sunrise together.

Mia Says: When Jonathan and I were dating we used to drive out to the beach and watch the sunset all the time, so this was a great date for us! We enjoyed watching the sun come up together, sipping on some fantastic hot chocolate that he made for us! The sunrise was gorgeous and a wonderful way to start the day!

Project 52 Date #41

So this past week was crazy, every night was filled with either JT working or we were heading out of town, so we really had to work hard to squeeze in a date. Although all of our dates we have tried not to make it a movie, I couldn't resist this time. I REALLY wanted to go see Courageous and I knew that it wouldn't be in theaters for very long. So we got completely unpacked, Jocelyn settled and fed, and everything cleaned up in only an hour and a half, phew. Thankfully, we had a Grami that missed Jocelyn, so she watched her as we went to the movie.
Everyone should see this movie! The acting wasn't that great of course, but the message behind it was pure inspiration! Every guy should aspire to be that kind of father and that kind of husband that makes time for their family in meaningful and purposeful ways. Another movie that I saw recently was "I don't know how she does it" and there is a line in the end that wraps up everything. "There will always be another job but there will only be ONE family of mine!"
Anyway as I get teary eyed just thinking of these movie and the message behind them I encourage everyone to take the time for your family and spend it in meaningful and purpose memory making ways! Awesome date!

JT: We definitely had a booked schedule this week between a visit with Mia's dad and my sister's weekend wedding. But we did manage to squeeze a date in to go to the movies. Mia's been wanting to see Courageous since first seeing the previews online months before it's release. I did too so we caught the 7:00 P.M. show. It turned out to be a really good movie. It doesn't have Academy Award winning acting, or John Woo special effects, but the storyline is really good. And it's not really a cop movie as much as it is a movie about family and what it means to be a good man and a good father. I really liked how the movie portrayed the struggles of father's and how support from other men is essential. I teared up pretty hard during several scenes, it was pretty emotionally moving. We talked alot about the movie on the way home and how they did an excellent job of getting the viewer to feel what the characters were feeling as they went thru things. Good movie and a really good date.

Love is…respect? (Week 41)

Maybe.
We’ll find out this weekend. My husband and I are going to the Love and Respect Conference and spending a romantic baby-less weekend together. I am super pumped for the alone time, but equally as pumped for the actual conference. While I’m not known for my long attention span, or for my love of organized instruction, I am BEYOND excited to see and hear about the relationship between love and respect. You can tell someone you love them all day long (and vice versa), but it is only when love is shown that it is in fact felt. Or maybe that’s just me.
If you read my awesome entry last week, you know that I wear many hats: mommy, wife, daughter, sister, friend, co-worker, and everything in between. I don’t know about you, but sometimes it’s hard for me to fumble through all of my responsibilities. Balance is a mysterious and awkward dance I’m trying to learn. However, I firmly believe that marriage is the most important relationship (in Christ) I will ever have, and it is imperative that I figure out how to be married the way Jesus wants me to be married. The Bible gives lots of instructions for being married, but translating that into my juggling dance can be quite a feat. A man and woman interacting can be the most beautiful or the most awful thing. We are SO different, which is why we complete each other so beautifully and have the potential to make each other happier than anyone in the world. But sometimes it gets ugly. Sometimes men and women don’t communicate effectively (ya think?) and all hell breaks loose, literally.
I challenge you to allow love and respect to bless your socks off all week long!

Project 52 Date #40

Tub-N-Talk was the name of the date, and you guessed we sat in a bathtub and talked. Now it obviously was a little fancier than just that. Bubble bath, 50 tea light candles(do you have any idea how long it takes to light and keep lit that many tea lights?!?) So after a very long day for both of us we eased into a very hot and bubbly tub(I overdid it on the water temp just a bit) in a candlelit bathroom and we just sat and soaked and talked. These days we only take a bath like once every six months so this was a special treat for both of us. We just sat and talked about our day and some future stuff going on and it was just really nice to sit peacefully and relax together. Obviously no great pictures cuz i haven't been working on my tan lately..... but I will show you one picture of my awesome setup.

She says: This was awesome! I am a huge bath person and just don't take the time honestly to do it often enough! It was even better to sit still, no phones, not computer, no tv, no distractions and just talk. Wonderful date babe!

Love is...GRACE (Week 40)

Love is...GRACE.
The older I get, literally, day by day, I am learning. I'm learning that no matter how hard I work at being whatever it is I deem "perfect," I'm just not meant to be so. I'm sometimes a bad wife, sometimes a bad friend, a bad employee, a bad mommy, a bad daughter, a bad sister.
It's human nature to have expectations, to want people to stick to their word and follow through. But grace allows us to forgive other's transgressions. Grace gives us the power to forgive others. What a gift- letting others be free of your judgments and sore feelings!! Often I am disappointed, and I'm reminded that I am called to extend grace. Often I disappoint others, and pray that they too, are reminded to extend grace.
I am unable to function, to make it through a single day, without grace. We are called to love one another, and I firmly believe that grace is a primary manifestation of that love. Thank you Jesus for teaching us about grace.
So love each other, love yourself.
And stop taking everything so damn seriously.
-Allison