I take you to be my husband in good times and in bad, in plenty and in want, in sickness and in health…I promise to love and honor you all the days of my life. Our wedding vows were pretty standard. We looked deeply into each other’s eyes that day and believed every word we said, although I am not sure we truly understood what they meant.
Next year we will celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary. I hadn’t thought of our vows since that day until one morning last week. We were in the shower. Brian had one arm around my waist holding my body against his while he used his other hand to gently wash my hair. It sounds romantic, maybe even sexy, but I was in agony. It was 48 hours after my shoulder surgery and the first time I was allowed to take a shower. If his arm hadn’t been around my waist I wouldn’t have been able to stand. It was at that moment, totally dependent upon my husband, that those vows came to mind. There he was, totally devoted to my care for better or worse. He woke up every 4 hours to give me pain medicine and replace my ice packs. He helped me to the bathroom, got me dressed each morning, changed the dressing over my
incisions, and put my hair in a ponytail. Oh, and all during finals week no less, when his brain was already fried from endless homework and studying.
It made me remember similar events, like my knee surgery, when he had to carry me up and down the stairs of our basement apartment. Then there was my emergency kidney stone surgery, which left him with a three year old and a hungry, screaming infant for two days, who had never taken a bottle…always there, always supportive, always devoted, rarely complaining.
Then I realized, since I have known him, he has never had surgery and has probably only been sick a handful of times. Wow, I’ve had it easy. Brian laughingly chalks it up to his superior genes!
In my mind I don’t deserve such devotion and feel indebted to him for eternity, but he never makes me feel guilty. He knows that when his turn comes I will be there for better or worse all the days of my life. There are no notches on the bedpost, no bulleted list saved on our computer somewhere…no one is keeping score. We approach each day with a clean slate, ready to do whatever it takes to uphold those words we so lovingly vowed to each other. Now, after almost ten years of marriage, we are just beginning to understand what those words really mean.
- Jennifer
No comments:
Post a Comment